Oh dear, the Bears are loose again!
I mentioned the bears to you, didn't I?
Oh - it was only one bear, wasn't it!
Sorry, I'll have to correct that - we now have two, it would seem.
That probably means that next year there will be more. But only if they stick to the rules!

I mentioned the rules, didn't I?
Yes, I'm sure I did. Bears may be seen, but not heard make a nuisance of themselves.
Ride their tricycles on the right-hand-side of the road and not steal lambs and such!

These bears, or at least one of them would seem to be foreign, or may be lacking, or even both. At least, he didn't seem to understand the rules when they were explained to him. Either that, or he is just contemptuous of Swiss rules.
Although I agree that not all Swiss rules are logical, it is not recomendable to just pass them over.
Sorry, the phones ringing ...

Hello, oh Bruno (the bear is a young male of 98 kg), how nice of you to call.
Look Bruno, we have a problem here - if you get hungry, as you are bound to at some time, please try eating grass or some leaves off the trees.
It might also be acceptable for you to climb up the slopes of the mountain you live on and eat one of the chamois that we are not allowed to shoot - they don't really belong to anyone you see. Like yourself they are just another endangered species.
You are not allowed to wander off downhill and just grab a lamb, when you feel like it.
And keep your paws off those bee-hives!
What was that?
Yes, I know it is easier to catch a lamb than a chamois, but lambs have owners, the chamois don't.

We can't shoot the chamois because they are endangered, we can shoot you if you go round stealing other peoples property.

You have to understand, that when other animals loose their shyness of humans, we call them tame. When young bears like yourself loose their shyness, we get worried and call them troublesome. Well, now we've developed a new "Bear Strategy" .
I'm not sure how sound an idea it is, but we've fitted you out with a bear telephone - strapped around your neck!
We're going to track you via GPS, you see. That way we shall be able to check on you and determine whether or not it really is you stealing our lambs.
If it is, you're in for trouble, I can assure you!

We'll start by letting off fire crackers to frighten the lambs you off. If that doesn't help, we'll pelt you with rubber bullets.
If that doesn't help - beware!

Now about that telephone. You are to phone us at regular intervalls and let us know where you are. There is no point in telling fibs, because when you phone in, we can track you to within 50 cm!
There are further rules, though. Sorry, you can't go up that way - yes, I know you live up there, but that is an area with no reception, you won't be able to phone in, will you. Silly bear!
And stop scratching at that collar - it was expensive! It's not supposed to be comfortable, it is supposed to hold the telephone in place. Now look what you've done - it's all mauled!

Yes Bruno, I know I'm nagging, but it is all to keep you out of harms way.
Yes, I know you are an endangered species, you cant keep harping on that.
To tell you the truth, we thought we'd got rid of the whole lot of you for good, years ago. If you wish to remain here now, you must behave yourself ...

... hello, Bruno? Bruno, I can't hear you. Are you there, Bruno, hellooo?
Damned dead spots!